Category: Creators

There are lots of articles out there on the benefits of skin-to-skin. Studies have been done. The benefits have been listed. I’ll let you use Google to find out more on all of that. I just want to tell you my own experience.

My daughter was born last week.  Her 1 week birthday is today. She’s a glorious little being and I’m in love with her. On her first day of life outside her Mommy, I held her close to me, skin-to-skin, in the dim light of the NICU and felt love swelling to embrace us both; my little girl and I together for the first day of a lifelong journey together.

And daily since, we rest together – she on my chest breathing softly and cooing. Her warm skin the softest thing ever against mine. Our hearts beating in conversation with one another.  Our energy flowing together. These moments are the most precious and cherished moments imaginable.  Her heart beats out a rhythm;  “I put myself in your care, I love you, trust you, depend on you, need you, believe in you”.  My heart beats back in answer; “I love you, I will protect you, I will nurture and support and guide you, I am always here for you, I believe in you, I will give my all for you”.  Lub-dub, Lub-dub, Lub-dub…..  our hearts beat on.

My two older daughters, now ten and seven, held this same conversation with me.  Just like her, I held them close and we spent these quiet moments in pools of sunshine on those newborn days and days well beyond.  Even my younger sister – now 25 years old and living an adventurous life of her own – spent this time with me all those years ago.  In a blink, years and decades pass. These brand-new little moments of life.  These first steps along their journey, are so fleeting and so magical. These are gifts. And by receiving these gifts we give them in return. We ground our children firmly in a deeply-felt sense of connection. We assure them with our hearts, our bodies, our souls; they are loved and they are cherished and they are supported. We build for them a foundation for their Bigness. And in doing so, we swim in the deepest waters of Bigness ourselves. For me, there is no Bigger Bigness than the Bigness of Being Daddy – and in these quiet little moments it swells beyond imaginable proportion. I don’t need any study or listing of the benefits. My heart tells me what I need to know…. Lub-dub, Lub-dub, Lub-dub.

Skin-to-skin isn’t just an important thing to consider for breastfeeding and motherly bonding – it’s also for all of us Daddies. It’s for baby. It’s for the journey, for their lives, for our experience of the miracle and for the beauty of Daddyhood. It’s for Bigness. If you’re a Daddy – don’t let these precious quiet moments pass you by.

~KG~

The other night I was invited to a scavenger hunt for a friend’s birthday.  It was St. Patrick’s Day as well, so the town was a-bustle with merry-making and revelry.  The invitation for the scavenger hunt invoked a notion of rushing around town, in and out of bars and establishments that seemed likely to be a chaotic endeavor.  My wife, nine months pregnant, is to the point of getting out of breath walking back upstairs with the laundry much less bar-hopping.  For my part, at the end of a long week a big Friday night these days consists of staying up past nine and maybe some mint-chocolate-chip ice cream.  Suffice to say, we felt uninspired.

Still, we wanted to be there for our friend, so we showed up thinking we’d at least make a quick appearance and be part of the send-off.  In the process, we learned the history of this tradition.  It had begun with his parents and had gone on for many years, passed down now and honored in his own life.  That context made if feel bigger, alive, rich with a backdrop of excitement.  We decided to give it a go, despite our exhaustion and it already being bedtime.

We broke into teams and were given a list of obscure tasks to accomplish, photos to take, items to gather and challenges to seek.  The mission was to be limited to an hour and a half.  With that, we set off into the St. Paddy’s night air in a flurry.  We searched madly for everything from green condoms to dog poop, taking photos with random strangers, seeking out a means of getting handcuffed by a police officer, running around madly in a roundabout, taking selfies in a bar bathroom with seven grown men in kilts and green hats – and many more zany tasks.  The exhaustion was gone in the first few minutes, replaced with exhilaration and a sense of adventure.  I was reminded of my goofy teenage years.  There was laughter and silliness and teamwork and confusion.  We entertained ourselves and strangers, spread our joy like a contagion to folks along the way.  With minutes to spare, we reported back to base for the judging – and to share stories of hilarity with all the other participants.  Smiles all around, it was a room filled with joy and simple fun.  Though we went home at the end of the night well past our bedtime, once again exhausted – It was Bigness and we were grateful we’d said yes to it.

Often in life, it’s easier to say no.  We’re tired.  It’s been a long week.  It’s too late at night.  It’s too late in our career.  It’s too late to start over.  It’s too much work or too much energy or the timing just isn’t right.  When we say “yes” though, that’s when Bigness reveals itself.  It can be discouraging to think of how long it might take to become really talented at the guitar, so we put it off until there’s more time.  But if we pick up the guitar and just strum for a while, Bigness visits us right in that moment and we find ourselves on the road to becoming really talented with it – right now.  It can feel overwhelming to consider how long it would take to write that book, so we dream about ‘someday’ and working at it in retirement.  But if we sit down and write a few pages, we feel the Bigness rising within us and we realize we’re writing that book….RIGHT NOW.

Keep yourself open to the Bigness in your life and in you – and remember to say Yes.

~KG@GWB~

Today I Googled the history of International Women’s Day.  I’d never really looked into it.  I had no idea that over 100 years ago, predecessors to today’s observation of the value, power and worth of women had sprung from the socialist and communist movements in the world,  later became embraced by union organizers and the UN and would ultimately ring through the ensuing decades down to 2017 – where we would still find appalling treatment of women in our world, a “leader” of the free world who is openly abhorrent toward women, and still millions marching and demonstrating for women’s basic rights.

As a father of two adventurous, curious, strong, intelligent, loving, empathetic, tough, humorous, giving, wonderful girls with another baby girl on the way this week, I’m dismayed we have an International Women’s Day.  I want to destroy it.  I want it to become so irrelevant that we need not hold space for a single day to draw focus on the worth of women.  I want a world that celebrates the vital essence of women every day.  I want a world that realizes there would be no world of humanity without women.  I want a world that sees the adventurous, curious, strong, intelligent, loving, empathetic, tough, humorous, giving, wonderful in women.  A world that sees women’s power and is grateful for the cherished daughters, the loving wives, the sacrifice-my-world-for-you mothers.  We need to destroy International Women’s Day – and here’s how.

Start by engaging your little girls with every confidence of their worth, every day.  Encouraging them, supporting them, driving them to dream as big and wide and deep and large as they can. Show them every role model of feminine strength, power, beauty, vulnerability, empathy, goodness, success and wisdom you can.  Give them every chance to embrace masculine role models, too.  Take them hunting, fishing, wrestling, skiing, swimming, adventuring, diving.  Teach them to fight as much as to sew.  Raise them to know that the world is equally theirs.  Let them see you acting in ways consistent with these messages.  Start by engaging your little boys, too, in the very same pursuits.  Let them see and embrace the modeling of strength, power, beauty, vulnerability, empathy, goodness, success and wisdom in women. Show them those traits in yourself.  Lift up those examples of both women and men that shine with morality and integrity and goodness. Teach your little girls and your little boys that they are equally capable of bringing vital beauty to a world that celebrates all humans as whole humans – with respect and worth and love.

Let’s look around today and every day at the things that perpetuate negative messages toward women and girls.  Let’s not stand for them.  Let’s smash them.  Let each and every one of us no longer tolerate treating women as lesser beings.  Let us no longer agree to passively accept marketing, legislation, attitudes, slang, jokes, behavior and norms that continue this age-old campaign to keep women “in their place”.  Let’s Look around at everything from our own day-to-day behavior, to the types of books on the shelves of our libraries and let’s change this ridiculous story once and for all.

Let’s destroy International Women’s Day by honoring it every day.  Let’s teach our little boys and girls to change the world.

Happy International Women’s Day

~ Keith Glendon @Gooderwithbigness ~

Also, check out this awesome story of Bigness, this International Women’s Day